I realize of course that it is harping on the same old juze (if you don't know what one of those is, you're a loser) to even bring this up, but who was the idiot who coined the phrase 'funny bone' in reference to ones ulnar nerve? Incidentally, if he did indeed 'coin' it, specifically, if he is indeed making money off the sadistic comparison, I would personally like to traumatize the rest of his life by way of his ulnar nerve. Of course you laugh when you hit it, because of the name. It's so ridiculous to say you hit your funny bone, while you are really one emotional measurement away from crying. (On a side note, what would that be called? There are decibels, light years, kilometers, and such. What is the measurement of emotion called?)
I had one very such experience t'other day. I was almost done with work for the night. All I had left to do was drop bank, which is always something I look forward to. The people that work at the hotel are very entertaining individuals and I always enjoy my time spent dropping bank. It is my habit to always bring my purse in with me and lock my doors. Call it what you will, it's paranoia, but a justifiable paranoia. I had reached into my car to do just that and then brought my arm over and around my door to close it. While doing this, I hit my ulnar nerve squarely on the corner of my open door. Now if you are familiar with the way a funny bone pain makes progress, which I believe most people are, you know that it doesn't hurt that bad at first. It's kind of like, 'Ow, I could have done without that', and then you begin to go about your business. Which is what I did. Until it started to hurt worse. I shook my arm and bent down in the middle of the parking lot, trying to talk myself out of passing out, which is not a very cool thing to do, partly because it's so unpleasant, and partly because it's not so tough. All I knew was that I needed to get inside, because I could not just lay down and wait for the dizziness to pass in the middle of the parking lot. Again, not cool, and not safe. So i stood shakily up, and began to stumble into the hotel. There are of course several kinds of stumble. There's a stumble when you get drunk, which is definitely not cool, there's a stumble when you first wake up and stumble into the bathroom to relieve your bladder. Then there is a stumble that happens when you've been hit with excessive force on your head... or when you've hit your 'funny bone'. That is the stumble that barely got me into the hotel, past the guest at the front counter, and through the coded door that leads to the staff area. I was awaited by one of the hotel employees, who we shall call Adrian, who promptly asked me if I was okay. "Okay?! Okay!? Do I look okay?" I shouted back...
Actually, I moaned a negative response and thereby collapsed to the floor, my belongings scattering unheeded across the floor. Oh, the sweat was so cold, and the stars were so bright that they blinded me. But somehow, I remained more conscious than not, and moaned my way back into existence. Somewhere in this while, Adrian found it in his big kind heart to ask what I'd done. My response was a mumbled explanation that I had hit my funny bone. At which time he started laughing. What are friends and co-workers for but to laugh at you when you hit a nerve? I was aware of a muffled apology, and a 'I'm not laughing' from the said co-worker. I responded that I didn't care if he laughed, as long as he let me lay there. Within a few moments, I was able to roll to a sitting position and laugh with Adrian and Kevin, the other guy working who had seen my entry from the front desk. I'm just glad that I can bring a little excitement into their boring hotel job. And now I can proudly boast that I hit my funny bone so hard that it almost knocked me out. Now, THAT'S cool...
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